The Queen is dead ! Long live the Queeen ! (not)

The new Chatteris Town Council met for the first time on the 8th May. Your dedicated blogger has pledged to report to you all the triumphs, disasters, and shenanigans of this august body.

The burning question was who would become Chatteris’ first Mayor. Would Florrie surrender her vice like grip on the chair after 16 years ? Would the eternal bridesmaid, Sue Elam, finally get her hour of glory ? The meeting started with a eulogy of praise for Florrie, appropriately lead by the ‘oldest member’ octogenarian Ray German. Flowers and paintings were given in recognition of her truly memorable achievement (the praise being directed at Florrie’s longevity, not her actual record of achievement which could be best summarised as keeping the Town’s £1million languishing in the bank for almost all that period).

The outgoing chair then named her heir - and indeed it was our Sue ! Cllr Elam accepted the honour with yet more fulsome praise for her predecessor, and the meeting turned to its next appointment, that of mayor in waiting, or deputy mayor. Quick as a flash Florrie’s sister in law (Cllr Stimson) proposed - no wait for it, guess - yes Florrie herself.

As the smoke cleared and the mirrors stopped revolving (metaphorically speaking) it became clear that the whole succession was an elaborately stage managed illusion. Florrie was still close to the top of the table, the reigns as firmly grasped in her hands as ever, and Sue little more than a titular head. “Plus ca change, plus c'est la meme difference !” (the more things change, the more they stay the same) Spare a thought for poor Sue. Will she really be allowed to get on with trying to achieve positive change, or will her worthwhile endeavours continue to be put down, suppressed, or simply vetoed ?

Both mayor and deputy made frequent and repeated reference to the ‘great loss’ to the council of the councillors who failed to be re-elected, unenthusiastically welcoming the new councillors through apparently gritted teeth. It appeared that the “old guards’ ” wrath was not directed at the new members who belonged to their own party, but at the new 23 year old Lib Dem, Ed Bryce, for his temerity in obtaining a democratic mandate. A bizarre and slightly unpleasant ritual then followed, when the councillors went round the table introducing themselves. One by one they justified their office solely in terms of how long they have lived in Chatteris. It appears that the combined group are qualified entirely on the basis of having lived in town for over 300 years between them. Florrie’s ‘iron grip’ is justified by the Doomsday book ! All hope of a new and inclusive council flew out the window with the clearly implied criticism of the three lib dem councillors (7 years, 7 years and 13 years in Chatteris) as new comers. This ongoing criticism that new comers shouldn’t have any say in the future of the Town they have chosen to make their home, was a dark and deeply offensive characteristic of the last Council, clearly inherited by the new Council. This blogger believes that the Council should represent all Chatteris, not denigrate recent arrivals and continue to compound the myth of a deep division between ‘old & new Chatteris’ !

More of this fascinating Machiavellian tragedy to follow !

Walter Burnett is a pen name.

BATTLE FOR THE CROWN

The freshly elected new Chatteris Town Council meets for the first time on Tuesday 8 May 2007.

Its first job will be to elect Chatteris’ first Mayor. The prospect of donning the Chain has engaged many of the Members, and betting is fierce on who will receive this honour. Leading contenders are:

No. 1 - Cllr Mrs Florence Newell. ‘Florrie’ has already been chairman of the town council for a quite remarkable 16 years ! In May ‘06 Florrie went to press saying that should would not even stand again for Town Council in May 07, however a change of heart has seen her re-elected for the Wenneye ward. More recently she has ruled out becoming the first Mayor, but will the glitter of Office prove too seductive to the only member of the council who doesn’t actually live in Chatteris ?

No. 2 - Cllr Mrs Sue Elam. Sue has loyally served Florrie as deputy Chairman for 9 years, not even protesting when Florence has claimed credit for Sue’s achievements (for example the mini skate board park). It is widely know that Sue coverts the ‘crown’ and many believe she has always been promised the succession. But in the cold light of the new council will political ambition take precedence over old promises ? And if the promise to Sue is reneged on, will Sue be able to bare to stay on the council ? She may be offered the consultation of Deputy Mayor, but can Sue remain for ever the bridesmaid ?

No. 3 - Cllr Peter Murphy. Peter appeared to become Florence’s deadliest of enemies in 2003 when he defeated her in the 2003 district council election. However since Florence defected and became a ‘born again Conservative’ an uneasy marriage of convenience exists, which extended to Florence standing with Peter in Wenneye ward for town (and accepting the diminished role of ‘second fiddle’) and the reverse alliance happening in Slade Lode ward. Peter’s rise within the District Council was been meteoric, with his almost immediate elevation to ‘portfolio holder for toilets’. Hot money is on Peter becoming the first Mayor, but most observers believe that no-one can achieve this exalted position without Florence’s blessing. Are all the old wounds really completely healed ?

This blogger promises not only to update you with the result, but also report all the shenanigans and political manoevering. And I plan to regularly update you on happenings at this ‘vicar of Dibleyesque’ body. Wait with baited breath for your next installment !

Walter Burnett is a pen name